In this video Dr David B Hawkins, Licensed Clinical Psychologist and Director of The Marriage Recovery Center helps you understand the narcissistic sense of entitlement. He helps you explore how to confront this and intervene in this incredibly destructive process.
The Narcissistic Sense of Entitlement
Narcissism and sense of entitlement are deeply intertwined, especially when dealing with individuals who exhibit narcissistic personality traits or even have Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD). These individuals possess an inflated sense of self-importance and an insatiable need for admiration.
Their towering egos, often stemming from deep-seated insecurities and unresolved childhood issues, propel them to believe that they are the rulers of the world. However, beneath their charm lies emotional immaturity and a lack of insight that prevents them from understanding the harm they inflict upon others.
The Illusion of Caring
Despite their self-absorbed nature, narcissistic individuals can momentarily appear caring and loving, albeit to a limited extent. However, their version of caring and love is distorted, as it serves their own agenda rather than genuinely valuing and respecting others.
They lack the emotional depth required for healthy relationships and fail to comprehend the dishonorable and abusive nature of treating people as puppets to be controlled and manipulated.
The Mask of Entitlement
Entitlement becomes a shield for narcissistic individuals, protecting them from feelings of insecurity, lack of control, and inadequacy. Deep down, they are often like little boys, throwing tantrums and defiantly declaring that they deserve the world to conform to their desires. Their entitlement blinds them to the consequences of their actions, as they live within a bubble where their control and manipulation seem justified.
The Limited Awareness of Narcissism
While the impact of their gaslighting, manipulation, and entitlement may be evident to onlookers, narcissistic individuals can only glimpse fragments of their behavior.
Their self-absorption prevents them from comprehending the full extent of their actions unless they are confronted head-on. Unfortunately, unless significant intervention takes place, they continue to ruin relationships and lives, ultimately leading to a tragic sense of isolation.
The Challenge of Change
If you find yourself entangled with a man who consistently acts entitled, believing that he deserves special treatment and controlling those around him, it is unlikely that he will change without significant intervention. Mere pleading, complaining, or yelling will not alter his behavior. To effect change, you must consider the possibility of intervention, which demands conviction, clarity, and robust support.
Recognizing Narcissistic Personality Traits
Determining whether your partner exhibits narcissistic personality traits or has full-blown Narcissistic Personality Disorder requires careful observation. Measure the extent of his entitlement, the degree to which he assumes a position of power and control, and evaluate his responsiveness to intervention.
The Power of Intervention
Changing a narcissistic individual requires a comprehensive intervention process. You must be willing to seek expert help that can guide you through the complex journey of bringing about effective change. Remember, change is most likely to occur when the narcissistic person loses the support and dependence they have on you. This pivotal moment reveals their true capacity for growth and maturity.
Don’t Tolerate Entitlement
If you choose to stay in the relationship, it is essential not to tolerate your partner’s entitled behavior. Setting boundaries and refusing to accept their manipulative tactics is crucial for your own well-being. However, be aware that achieving long-term change will necessitate a commitment to the intervention process.
Growing Up and Healing
Ultimately, the journey to healing involves helping the narcissistic individual grow up and develop emotional maturity. It requires shedding the belief that they can control the world, manipulate others, and demand their way. Emotionally mature and healthy relationships are built on mutual respect, compromise, and shared power.
Seeking Support and Assistance
When dealing with narcissism and entitlement, it is essential to gather information, seek support, and consult professionals who specialize in these dynamics. They can provide valuable insights and guide you through the intervention process. Remember, you are not alone in this challenging journey.
The narcissistic sense of entitlement can cause significant harm within relationships and lives. It is crucial to recognize the signs of narcissistic personality traits and evaluate the potential for change through intervention. Do not tolerate entitled behavior, but instead, seek expert help to navigate the path toward healing and growth. Remember, emotionally mature relationships are built on respect, compassion, and shared power.
About Dr. Hawkins:
The internet is inundated with hyperbole and misinformation about narcissism, leaving many people confused and hopeless. Get the facts on narcissism and emotional abuse from someone who has been researching, writing about and treating narcissism and emotional abuse for over a decade.
Dr. Hawkins is a best-selling author and clinical psychologist with over three decades of experience helping people break unhealthy patterns and build healthier relationships.
He is the founder and director of the Marriage Recovery Center and the Emotional Abuse Institute which offers education, training and counseling for people who want to break free of, and heal from, emotional abuse. Whether the perpetrator of the abuse is your spouse, partner, parent, boss, friend or family member, we offer practical advice for anyone trapped in a toxic, destructive relationship.
In addition to narcissism & emotional abuse, you’ll learn about the lesser known forms of abuse, including covert abuse, reactive abuse, spiritual abuse, secondary abuse, relationship trauma and much more.