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The Importance Of Self-Care

The Importance Of Self-Care and Healing in the Midst of a Crisis

Are you facing a crisis in your marriage and feeling completely overwhelmed? Are you reeling from the effects of a divorce or the loss of a relationship? Lee Kaufman from the Marriage Recovery Center discusses the importance of self-care when you are in the midst of a crisis, and provides some tips on how to care for you body, mind and heart so that you can heal.

The Importance Of Self-Care and Healing in the Midst of a Crisis

In the realm of language and culture, we often find intriguing concepts that can shed light on the way we navigate our lives. Mandarin Chinese, for instance, offers us an interesting perspective on self-care and selfishness. There are two distinct symbols or words in Chinese that represent selfishness, one with a positive connotation, emphasizing self-care and the other with a negative connotation, suggesting potential cruelty towards others.

This contrast highlights the complexity of the concept of self-care and how it can be perceived differently. It prompts us to ponder whether English and other languages could benefit from a similar duality, especially during times of crisis. This article explores the importance of self-care and healing in the midst of a crisis, taking into account the body, mind, and heart.

Body: The Foundation of Self-Care

The foundation of self-care begins with the body. Scientific evidence unequivocally supports the idea that one of the most potent tools for affecting positive change in the body is quality sleep. Getting anything less than seven hours of sleep can leave us short-tempered, less decisive, less clear, and unable to formulate our thoughts effectively. Here are three top tips for ensuring a good night’s sleep:

  1. Embrace Complete Darkness: The first step to improving your sleep quality is creating an environment of complete darkness. Consider investing in blackout curtains, turn off all lights in your room, and cover any LEDs that might be emitting light. Even the smallest sources of light can disrupt your sleep.
  2. Respect Your Body’s Biology: The pineal gland in your brain is light-sensitive and plays a crucial role in regulating sleep. It secretes melatonin, the hormone that prepares your body for sleep. Exposure to artificial light, such as that from electronic devices or bright indoor lighting, can confuse and dysregulate this gland. To support a better night’s sleep, minimize exposure to artificial light in the hours leading up to bedtime.
  3. Avoid Alcohol and Caffeine: Both alcohol and caffeine have the potential to disrupt sleep cycles. Refrain from consuming any caffeinated beverages several hours before bedtime, and consider reducing or eliminating alcohol intake before sleep. This will help you achieve deeper REM sleep and maintain healthy circadian rhythms.

Mind: The Importance of Mental Well-being

During a crisis, our minds tend to become overwhelmed and chaotic, making self-care even more crucial. Calming the mind is essential, and technology can be a valuable ally in this endeavor. Some meditation apps offer effective ways to introduce meditation into your life, whether you are a beginner or more experienced practitioner. They provide guidance and structure to help you cultivate mindfulness, reduce stress, and maintain mental clarity.

Heart: The Power of Compassion and Connection

The Chinese saying, “If you want to be happy for a lifetime, help someone else,” holds profound wisdom. Science supports this notion, with MRI and fMRI technology revealing that helping others triggers the same reward pathways in the brain as pleasurable activities like eating delicious food or engaging in intimate experiences. The act of assisting others not only connects us with the broader spectrum of humanity but also brings a sense of joy and fulfillment.

To nurture your heart and practice self-care during a crisis, consider the following:

  1. Engage in Acts of Kindness: Seek out opportunities to help others in your community. This could involve volunteering at a local church, community center, or an after-school program. Contributing your time and energy to assist those in need not only benefits your heart but also positively impacts the lives of others.
  2. Foster Human Connection: During times of crisis, it’s easy to become isolated and disconnected. Make an effort to stay connected with family and friends, whether through phone calls, video chats, or in-person meetings (when circumstances allow). These connections provide emotional support and strengthen your heart’s well-being.
  3. Practice Gratitude: Regularly reflect on the things you are grateful for. Expressing gratitude for the positive aspects of your life can boost your mental and emotional health, enhancing your ability to cope with challenging situations.


Self-care and healing are essential components of navigating a crisis, and they encompass various aspects of our being, including the body, mind, and heart. While these aspects may appear separate, they are deeply interconnected and can significantly influence each other. By implementing self-care practices in each area, we can work to heal and bring them into harmony, like a conductor orchestrating a symphony.

Incorporate these tips and tools into your daily life, and you’ll likely find that the challenges and difficulties of a crisis become more manageable. Ultimately, the goal is to promote your well-being and resilience during trying times. Remember that taking care of yourself is not selfish but a necessary step in building the strength to face and overcome life’s challenges. So, embark on this journey of self-care, and may you find peace and healing in the midst of any crisis that comes your way.

To learn how we can help, reach out to us at (206) 219-0145 or info@marriagerecoverycenter.com to speak with a Client Care Specialist

Also read: How to Create Change in Your Marriage

About Dr. Hawkins:

The internet is inundated with hyperbole and misinformation about narcissism, leaving many people confused and hopeless. Get the facts on narcissism and emotional abuse from someone who has been researching, writing about and treating narcissism and emotional abuse for over a decade.

Dr. Hawkins is a best-selling author and clinical psychologist with over three decades of experience helping people break unhealthy patterns and build healthier relationships.

He is the founder and director of the Marriage Recovery Center and the Emotional Abuse Institute which offers education, training and counseling for people who want to break free of, and heal from, emotional abuse. Whether the perpetrator of the abuse is your spouse, partner, parent, boss, friend or family member, we offer practical advice for anyone trapped in a toxic, destructive relationship.

In addition to narcissism & emotional abuse, you’ll learn about the lesser known forms of abuse, including covert abuse, reactive abuse, spiritual abuse, secondary abuse, relationship trauma and much more.


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