You’ve fallen in love with a man. At first it goes well, but then things go South. In this video Dr. David B. Hawkins, Director of The Marriage Recovery Center, talks about how unsuspecting women fall in love with the charismatic man who turns out to be shallow and self-centered. Watch this video to learn where to start if you are in a relationship with a narcissistic man.
How do You Build a Relationship with a Narcissistic Man?
So, your heart has been broken. The dream that you had for this wonderful relationship has come crashing in, and yet you’re in deep. Your life is intertwined with this man who has so many wonderful traits and yet so many destructive traits. The intermingling of those traits creates chaos and confusion for you. In this article, we will explore how to build a relationship with a narcissistic man and navigate the complexities that come with it.
Step back and be honest about the relationship
To initiate any change, you need to be honest with yourself about the relationship. Take the time to sit down and do a fearless inventory. Evaluate the pros and cons, the good and the bad, and the ugly aspects of the relationship. Acknowledging the reality of the situation is crucial for moving forward.
Determine if he is really in love with you
Narcissistic men often have a distorted sense of love. They may be infatuated with an image of themselves or project their desires onto you. Assess whether he genuinely loves you as an individual or if his love is conditional based on his expectations. Understanding his true feelings is essential for building a healthy and fulfilling relationship.
Assess willingness to work on the relationship
Building a relationship with a narcissistic man requires effort from both parties. Determine if he is willing to invest in the relationship and work towards healing both the relationship and himself. Recognize that this work is challenging and may require professional help, such as couples counseling.
Seek professional help and genuine change
Couples counseling can provide a valuable platform for growth and transformation. Find a qualified and experienced therapist who understands narcissistic character patterns. Ensure that your partner is not only willing to attend counseling sessions but also open to the counseling process itself. Genuine change requires a commitment to self-reflection, personal growth, and addressing dysfunctional patterns.
Trust that time will reveal the truth
Time is a revealing factor in any relationship. Trust that with time, you will see if your partner is genuinely committed to the counseling process and making positive changes. Observe if he listens to your feedback, empathizes with you, and validates your point of view. These are signs of growth and a willingness to nurture a relationship built on mutual respect and understanding.
Seek support and feedback from trusted individuals
It is crucial to seek support and counsel from trustworthy friends, family members, or professionals who can provide objective feedback. Often, we are blinded by our own biases and blind spots, making it challenging to see the situation clearly. Allow others to speak into your life and provide insights on whether the issues stem from narcissistic traits or if there is a deeper narcissistic personality disorder at play. Their guidance can help you determine what it will take to bring about change and if both you and your partner are ready for that journey.
Remember, honesty, insistence on change, healthy boundaries, and self-reflection are vital in navigating a relationship with a narcissistic man. If the situation becomes overwhelming, consider taking time away to regain your balance and develop a healthy perspective. Building a relationship with a narcissistic man is a complex process, but with patience, self-awareness, and support, positive change is possible.
Also read: How to Heal From Emotional Abuse Trauma
About Dr. Hawkins:
The internet is inundated with hyperbole and misinformation about narcissism, leaving many people confused and hopeless. Get the facts on narcissism and emotional abuse from someone who has been researching, writing about and treating narcissism and emotional abuse for over a decade.
Dr. Hawkins is a best-selling author and clinical psychologist with over three decades of experience helping people break unhealthy patterns and build healthier relationships.
He is the founder and director of the Marriage Recovery Center and the Emotional Abuse Institute which offers education, training and counseling for people who want to break free of, and heal from, emotional abuse. Whether the perpetrator of the abuse is your spouse, partner, parent, boss, friend or family member, we offer practical advice for anyone trapped in a toxic, destructive relationship.
In addition to narcissism & emotional abuse, you’ll learn about the lesser known forms of abuse, including covert abuse, reactive abuse, spiritual abuse, secondary abuse, relationship trauma and much more.