Dr. David B. Hawkins, Director of The Marriage Recovery Center, shares how to help a Narcissist heal, through bringing the bottom to him. Many Narcissists are very dependent on their mate and when that bond is threatened they will be motivated to change!
How to Help a Narcissist Heal
Narcissistic personality traits can pose significant challenges in relationships, leading to confusion and frustration for those involved. While narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) is a more severe condition, many individuals exhibit narcissistic traits that can still be problematic. However, it is essential to understand that change is possible, and supporting narcissists in their healing journey can lead to positive transformation. In this article, we will explore effective ways on how to help narcissists heal and foster a healthier relationship.
Recognizing the Need for Breakdown and Breakthrough
Without a breakdown, there can be no breakthrough. It is crucial to understand that a significant shift in the narcissist’s behavior and mindset can occur when they reach a breaking point. This breakthrough often happens when their partner, usually a woman, decides to set clear boundaries and demands change. By refusing to tolerate harmful behaviors, the woman initiates a breakdown that can pave the way for personal growth and transformation.
Encouraging Professional Help
When a woman decides to leave a narcissistic partner, he may initially react with anger and defiance. However, if the woman emphasizes that reconciliation is contingent upon seeking professional help, there is a chance for positive change. It is essential to recommend a therapist who specializes in narcissistic personality traits and has experience working with these individuals. Additionally, communication with the therapist is crucial to prevent the narcissists from manipulating the therapy process.
Contrary to common beliefs, individuals with narcissistic traits can develop empathy and compassion. While it may seem challenging at first, empathy can be cultivated through therapy and self-reflection. It is crucial for the narcissists to gain insight into how their actions have impacted others, particularly their partner. The therapy process should focus on fostering genuine caring and connection while dismantling the narcissist’s patterns of entitlement and exploitation.
Individual and Couples Therapy
A combination of individual and couples therapy can be highly beneficial for a narcissist’s healing journey. Individual therapy allows the narcissist to explore their own thoughts, emotions, and past experiences that contribute to their narcissistic traits. Couples therapy provides a safe space for the narcissist and their partner to address relationship dynamics, enhance communication, and rebuild trust.
Encouraging Self-Reflection and Apology
To facilitate personal growth, the narcissist must engage in deep self-reflection and take ownership of their behavior. It is crucial for the narcissist to acknowledge the pain they have caused their partner and genuinely apologize. A sincere apology involves fully understanding and feeling the impact of their actions, leading to empathy and a desire to change.
A spiritual awakening can be a powerful catalyst for change in narcissistic individuals. Incorporating spiritual practices and seeking a higher purpose can provide the necessary support and guidance for personal transformation. It is essential to encourage the narcissist to explore their spirituality and find meaning beyond their self-centered tendencies.
Establishing Clear Boundaries
Throughout the healing process, it is vital for the partner to establish clear and firm boundaries. The narcissists may resist these boundaries, but they serve as a reminder of the commitment to change. Consistently reinforcing boundaries creates a safe space for personal growth and allows for the rebuilding of the relationship on healthier terms.
Supporting a narcissist’s healing requires honest and direct communication. Speaking truth into their life means challenging their distorted beliefs and behaviors. By providing them with constructive feedback, they can gain a better understanding of the consequences of their actions and work towards positive change.
Change is possible for individuals with narcissistic traits, and it is important to recognize that healing is a journey that requires commitment from both partners. By initiating a breakdown, encouraging professional help, cultivating empathy, and fostering personal growth, it is possible to help heal the narcissists and establish a healthier and more fulfilling relationship.
Also read: The Risks of Confronting an Emotional Abuser
About Dr. Hawkins:
The internet is inundated with hyperbole and misinformation about narcissism, leaving many people confused and hopeless. Get the facts on narcissism and emotional abuse from someone who has been researching, writing about and treating narcissism and emotional abuse for over a decade.
Dr. Hawkins is a best-selling author and clinical psychologist with over three decades of experience helping people break unhealthy patterns and build healthier relationships.
He is the founder and director of the Marriage Recovery Center and the Emotional Abuse Institute which offers education, training and counseling for people who want to break free of, and heal from, emotional abuse. Whether the perpetrator of the abuse is your spouse, partner, parent, boss, friend or family member, we offer practical advice for anyone trapped in a toxic, destructive relationship.
In addition to narcissism & emotional abuse, you’ll learn about the lesser known forms of abuse, including covert abuse, reactive abuse, spiritual abuse, secondary abuse, relationship trauma and much more.