Sharmen Kimbrough MA of the Marriage Recovery Center provides insight on how to get started on a path of change and heal your relationship.
How to Change and Heal Your Relationship
In the intricate tapestry of life, relationships play a central role, shaping the course of our existence. They can uplift us, provide comfort, and bring joy, but they can also cause immense pain and turmoil. When you find yourself in a situation where you are unsure about how to navigate a troubled relationship or have experienced toxicity, abuse, or narcissism, it’s essential to take the first steps toward change and healing. This article aims to provide guidance on how to alter the trajectory of your life, even when you don’t know where to begin.
Starting with Truth
The journey towards healing begins with embracing the truth. In times of crisis and uncertainty, holding on to fundamental truths can provide a stable foundation. One profound truth that many people find solace in is the belief in a higher power, often referred to as God.
You can start by acknowledging that there is a divine presence, a God who is sovereign, all-knowing, and all-powerful. This fundamental truth reminds you that even in the midst of chaos, there is a force greater than yourself. By recognizing that “God is God, and I am NOT,” you set the stage for a transformative journey. This simple belief can be a source of immense strength when you are feeling lost.
Trusting God with Your Time
Building on the foundation of acknowledging God’s sovereignty, it’s important to remember that your times are in His hand. Even when you feel like everything is spinning out of control, you can hold on to the concept that God is orchestrating the timing of events in your life. This acknowledgment can be a lifeline, offering a sense of order in the midst of chaos.
While it might seem like a small step, clinging to this truth can provide a sense of security and purpose. When you don’t know where to start, simply recognizing that you are part of a greater plan can be profoundly reassuring.
Bringing Your Attention to Today
The path to healing often involves redirecting your focus to the present moment. Instead of being overwhelmed by the past or anxious about the future, the key is to embrace the here and now. Start by doing what you know to do today.
It’s easy to underestimate your own abilities and wisdom, especially when you’ve been in a challenging relationship. However, there are universal truths and principles that can guide your actions. The Bible, for instance, offers clear guidance on how to live a righteous and virtuous life. It teaches us to love our enemies, to be kind, generous, gracious, merciful, and to avoid falsehood. These principles provide a framework for behavior that is rooted in goodness and truth.
You may know more than you think you do, and by applying these principles to your daily life, you can take the first steps toward healing. In doing what you know to be right, you start to regain strength, perspective, wisdom, and discernment. This enables you to recognize the path that God may be calling you to walk.
Honoring God with Every Step
As you build on your foundation of truth and begin to do what you know is right, you’ll find that you naturally align with God’s calling for your life. By consistently adhering to these principles, you will become more Christ-like in your interactions with others and the choices you make.
While this process may not immediately alter your circumstances, it will undoubtedly change the direction of your personal, emotional, physical, and spiritual journey. This shift toward righteousness, kindness, and authenticity sets you on a path toward healing. By continually honoring God with every step you take, you draw closer to a life that reflects your true calling.
Discovering Your Authentic Self
In the process of change and healing, you’ll start to notice that certain actions and beliefs resonate with your heart. These are the things that make you come alive, feel affirmed, and align with who God is calling you to be. Your genuine self begins to emerge, shedding the layers of pain and confusion from the past.
As you continue to follow the principles of truth and righteousness, you’ll find that you are naturally drawn toward activities, people, and choices that mirror your authentic self. These choices may lead you to new relationships, opportunities, and a life that you may not have thought possible. This transformation is not just about healing your current relationship but also about rediscovering and embracing your true identity.
Seeking Professional Help
While the steps mentioned above are essential, it’s also important to acknowledge that healing from a toxic or abusive relationship is a complex process. You may need professional guidance and support to navigate the challenges you face.
If you find yourself struggling to implement these steps or need someone to walk with you on this healing journey, consider reaching out to organizations like the Marriage Recovery Center. They have the expertise and experience to provide you with valuable insights and tools for healing and transforming your relationships.
When you’re trapped in a toxic or abusive relationship and don’t know where to begin, it’s crucial to anchor yourself in fundamental truths. By recognizing God’s sovereignty, acknowledging that your times are in His hand, and focusing on living a life aligned with timeless principles of goodness and truth, you can take the first steps toward healing.
Change and healing are not overnight processes, and they require patience and perseverance. However, by honoring God with every step you take and aligning with your authentic self, you can gradually transform your life and relationships. Seek professional guidance when needed, and remember that you have the strength and wisdom to embark on this transformative journey.
If you’re ready to take the first step toward healing and change, consider reaching out to organizations like the Marriage Recovery Center. Their dedicated professionals can support you in your journey towards healthier, more fulfilling relationships and a brighter future.
About Dr. Hawkins:
The internet is inundated with hyperbole and misinformation about narcissism, leaving many people confused and hopeless. Get the facts on narcissism and emotional abuse from someone who has been researching, writing about and treating narcissism and emotional abuse for over a decade.
Dr. Hawkins is a best-selling author and clinical psychologist with over three decades of experience helping people break unhealthy patterns and build healthier relationships.
He is the founder and director of the Marriage Recovery Center and the Emotional Abuse Institute which offers education, training and counseling for people who want to break free of, and heal from, emotional abuse. Whether the perpetrator of the abuse is your spouse, partner, parent, boss, friend or family member, we offer practical advice for anyone trapped in a toxic, destructive relationship.
In addition to narcissism & emotional abuse, you’ll learn about the lesser known forms of abuse, including covert abuse, reactive abuse, spiritual abuse, secondary abuse, relationship trauma and much more.