There are times when, after repeated traumatic experiences, hearts finally close.
We pull away from our mate, one wound at a time. We essentially divorce our mate, perhaps leading to ultimate separation and apparent irreconcilability.
Yet, the story does not have to end there. Brokenness and distance can be bridged, one listening ear after another. The bridge of hopelessness can be spanned by a soft word, a kindness, a gentle act leading to the faint prospect of hope.
When a couple finds themselves at odds, one pushed away from the other, there is still much that can be done. A couple can choose to bring healing to their relationship, even if they choose to end their love relationship.
What can be done within the marriage when one person has closed the door to reconciliation? What can be done when one or both hearts are closed to a renewed love relationship? This is still an opportunity for healing.
Hard feelings can be replaced by softness. Bitterness gives way to forgiveness.
What is the process for this healing? I meet with the couple several times with no expected outcome other than healing, which, at the least, would help both be healthier individuals and better parents. There is no ‘hard sell’ to coerce someone back into the marriage. There are no demands, no challenges, and no forced outcomes. The process is marked by gentleness and kindness.
Two people agree to participate in the Therapeutic Healing Process where we would meet in person or via Skype two-four times, two hours a session, for the purpose of healing wounds created or exacerbated in your marriage.
We would utilize the process described in the manual, Love Life of Your Dreams.
I encourage both parties to read the manual, Love Life of Your Dreams. I also encourage both to complete the Issues Worksheet. We work through the wounds brought to our sessions. I encourage both to come with an open heart, receptive and humble, to discover the journey between hopelessness and hope is not as far as you might have thought.
The Therapeutic Healing Process is powerful. The least that can happen is a healing of the wounds brought to, or exacerbated by, trauma within the marriage. You will walk away having experienced profound healing, able to determine more effectively if you want to explore possibilities or end the marriage.
Please consider this investment in yourself and your marriage.
Blessings,
David B. Hawkins, MSW, MA, PhD
Licensed Clinical Psychologist
Director, Marriage Recovery Center
