Creating an intervention
One of our favorite quotes here is
“There must be a breakdown before there’s a breakthrough.”
Intervention can help begin this process.
Do you long for a change in your marriage?
You’re sick and tired of feeling sick and tired. The emotional stress is taking its toll on your mind, your spiritual faith and now even your body. We shouldn’t be surprised that our bodies and mind record the toll of ongoing emotional and relational stress. You know that something needs to change, and soon, but you don’t know where to begin. The first step toward healing is to create a breakdown so that a breakthrough can be reached…it’s time for an intervention.
The Intervention Process
Recognize your need for radical change.
Most people settle for a little bit of change. They seek a little bit of counseling, read a few books and make minor changes, discouraged in the meager results. They tell themselves that their problems are not as big as they really are. Are you ready for radical change?
Identify what needs to be changed.
It is common to point the finger of blame externally, suggesting you play no part in the destructive process. As long as you continue to engage in blaming, shaming, blame-shifting, accusing and provoking, it makes it very hard for the relationship to improve. It’s time to accurately name the problems and prepare for an intervention—radical change.
Acknowledge ways you BOTH enable the destructive process to continue.
As long as you complain about the problems but don’t seek radical intervention, you enable the process to continue unchanged. Complaining, arguing, blaming and attacking are useless and even destructive processes. You must take ownership of your part in the problem.
Find qualified help to significantly change the destructive process.
Just as we seek health professionals when our symptoms reach a tipping point, so too we need mental health professionals to assist us in changing a destructive dance. We need help in creating an intervention whereby we will not continue destructive processes that we cannot see. We need a capable professional who will name the problem, help us identify it and isolate it, and then create an effective treatment plan to change it.
Be held accountable for change.
It is in our nature to slip back into old ways of functioning. Just as surely as I need weekly piano lessons to keep me on a track of growth and improvement, you need someone who will point out when you are slipping back into old, destructive patterns. You need someone who will speak truth into your life. The person (Psychologist/ Marriage Counselor/ Pastor) will have time and fortitude to “call you out” when they see the destructive patterns. Owning those patterns and their destructive impact, with God’s help you can change them.