Has reality finally set in that your spouse has a pornography or sexual addiction?
Are you feeling hopeless that your spouse can or will change?
There is hope for change…if you require it! How do I require change, you ask?
You must create a crisis from the Sexual Addiction to ensure change occurs…
You have been betrayed at the deepest level by your spouse. Your self worth and ability to trust has surely been impacted. This addiction and his/her acting out MUST STOP. There must be a critical conversation with your spouse that your marriage is BROKEN until he/she gets treatment for their addiction. This could mean an emotional or even a physical separation.
Most men that come to the Marriage Recovery Center for diagnosis and treatment of sexual addiction, do so because their wife made it clear that they must choose their addiction or their marriage…but they could NOT have both.
Boundaries for accountability need to be established
Safety must be put in place to ensure the addictive behavior stops. Establish a boundary that there is a filter on each computer, Internet is removed from phones, emails and text messages are to be shared. You are not to be his or her parent, but accountability is key to stop this defiant behavior.
Your spouse MUST get treatment
This addiction will not go away by itself. Your spouse must get into treatment for his/her addiction ASAP. Intensive treatment of 2-3 days will determine the patterns/rituals, level of addiction and the pain this behavior is stemming from.
Get help for your marriage
Your marriage is in crisis and will also need intensive marriage counseling to overcome this betrayal. Trust and intimacy can be reestablished once your spouse has undergone intensive treatment. Boundaries and agreements can be put in place to create safety and steps towards building trust once again. Learning to communicate in a healthy way is also critical to overcome this crisis.
There is hope for your marriage, for we see couples work through this addiction weekly and become a stronger, more connected partnership. Please contact us at 360-490-5446 or send us a message by clicking here